The Real Housewife of Bentley Avenue

One of the few good things about Kenley working some nights and weekends and me working part time is that when Valentine’s Day and my birthday fall on Mondays (they’re a week apart, if you didn’t know), we both have the day off.

Kenley fails to see how having V-Day and my birthday that close together is ever a good thing.

But since we didn’t get to celebrate Christmas or New Year’s together, we (mostly I) decided we should splurge.

We began our Valentine’s Day weekend on Sunday with a not-so-romantic but oh-so-good lunch at In-N-Out Burger, which owes its cultlike status in part to (you guessed it) “The Big Lebowski.” It was our second visit in two weeks. We would probably go more often if there weren’t always a line for the drive-through that extends into the neighboring shopping center parking lot.

How’s the burger? Better than McDonald’s, but not in the same league as Five Guys or Rockaway’s. “Those are good burgers, Dude.”

Sunday afternoon we were invited to a post-wedding party for our friends Carrie and Dave from Columbia, who got married in St. Lucia over Thanksgiving weekend. Carrie’s family lives in the Los Angeles area, and Carrie was nice enough to include Kenley and me in the celebration, which was held at a beautiful restaurant overlooking the water in Long Beach, about 30 minutes south of L.A. It was great to see familiar faces, and it was fun to meet some of Carrie’s friends who live in L.A. — all of whom, it should come as no surprise, could hold their own behind a karaoke mike.

On Valentine’s Day, we had breakfast at S&W Diner in downtown Culver City, which I’m sure will also become a favorite, partly because it’s cheap but mostly because they serve pancakes with Oreo crumbles and fresh strawberries! Kenley had the bacon-and-cheddar waffle.

They also had grits on the menu, which I had to test. I can make them much better.

A romantic day should include the beach if there’s one nearby, so we took Malia for a walk to the Santa Monica pier, where once again she got all the attention amid the small, yippy dogs, the buskers and the food vendors.

From the beach, we went to the Culver City ice-skating arena — something I wasn’t expecting to find in our new neighborhood. But it’s still not quite surfing weather out here yet.

We had pre-dinner drinks at Bottle Rock, a wine bar and shop similar to Cellar on Greene in Five Points. They offer $20 bottles of wine on Mondays, so another spot is added to my list of places we’ll definitely go back to. It will be a great place to take any of the wine-club girls when y’all come visit.

I had booked dinner reservations at a French bistro called Saint Amour, which was a very authentic French experience, complete with rude, French-speaking waiters. But Kenley’s mussels and frites were the best I’ve had since the Fat Hen in Charleston with Leigh and Dan several years ago. It was perfect for Valentine’s Day.

Tuesday was my first day working at the Loft. I’m working 12 to 15 hours a week to help earn my keep (and keep my discount) until I can find a full-time job. The store is in Marina Del Rey, which is a small resort town just south of Venice Beach. The store is expected to move in May and become one of a handful of new boutiquelike concept locations for Loft.

The following Sunday, we were invited to Kathy Bryja’s apartment for dinner. Kathy, a former features designer at The State, is an associate art director for The Hollywood Reporter. She and her fiance host a dinner for several couples every Sunday. You BYOB and drop $5 to $10 in a bowl, and Kathy and Justin cook. Not gonna find a cheaper meal than that in L.A. (not even In-N-Out Burger), and it’s nice to have a standing social engagement. We’ll go there Sunday to watch the Oscars, since you can’t actually get anywhere near the Kodak Theater on awards night.

In preparation for the Academy Awards, Kenley and I have watched all the nominees that are available at Blockbuster (still no Internet access for Netflix). Surprisingly, “Toy Story 3” was the one that made me cry. I found “The Social Network” interesting, “The Kids Are Alright” entertaining and “Winter’s Bone” depressing. As you can imagine, everyone here likes to talk about the movies, whether they’re in the biz or not.

I certainly never dreamed I’d be underemployed and living in Los Angeles on my 37th birthday. To celebrate, I planned a day around things you can do only in L.A. We had lunch at Fraiche, one of several restaurants in L.A. (and a couple in our neighborhood) nominated for the James Beard awards, the Oscars of the restaurant industry. I ordered a croque monsieur, which is probably not the dish that got the chef nominated, but it was still rich and decadent.

Kenley balked at paying $14 for what essentially is a glorified grilled-cheese sandwich. But at least I didn’t order the foie gras.

After lunch, we drove uptown to Hollywood because I wanted to at least see where the movie stars would walk the red carpet in about a week. The bleachers were set up on Hollywood Boulevard outside the entrance to the theater, but the only “celebrities” we saw were wannabe actors paid to dress in costumes and charge tourists to take photos with them. Kenley and I didn’t want to be mistaken for tourists, so we got out of there as quickly as possible.

Our next stop was Beverly Hills, where we waited in line for a Sprinkles cupcake, which is one of the first places the cupcake trend started. We also did some window shopping on Rodeo Drive. One goal is to buy something on Rodeo Drive before we leave this town. Kenley says it will probably be a sock.

For dinner, we went to Waterloo & City, also nominated for a James Beard award. It’s another gastropub, and I liked it much better than Ford’s Filling Station. I had vegetable pot pie and, for dessert, bourbon-glazed doughnuts.

But now it’s back to chicken fingers and microwave meals. We (mostly Kenley) have decided to stop the insanity; our splurging must come to an end. At least until we can afford that sock.

Our first week in L.A.

You can probably tell a lot about people by the places they seek out when exploring their new neighborhood.

Kenley and I arrived in Los Angeles on Saturday (1/29) afternoon. Our first meal was at the Baja Fresh just down the street from our apartment. Baja Fresh is a relatively healthy quick-service Mexican joint, sorta like Chipotle. Marketing materials boast that it doesn’t use microwaves. Kenley decried the lack of fatty, cheesy, processed options. It was the second time in the previous three meals that I had avocados. I already felt a little more like a Californian.

We also made the first of what I’m sure will be many stops at Ralphs, which is owned by Kroger. Kenley was eager to sign up for a Ralphs membership card.

For the uninitiated, “Big Lebowski” fans believe is essential to have a Ralphs membership card (the only form of ID the Dude carries).

For dinner, we met Kenley’s high-school friend and former Fling drummer, Ronnie “Romance” Cleland, who has been living in L.A. since Hurricane Katrina forced him out of New Orleans. We ate at a lovely little Italian place in downtown Culver City, which is kinda like the Vista in Columbia or Virginia Highlands in Atlanta.

Culver City is an old neighborhood in Los Angeles north of LAX, southwest of Hollywood and downtown L.A., and east of Venice Beach. “Gone With the Wind” was filmed at Culver Studios, which is still in operation. Sony Pictures also is located here. You can take tours of both.

Our apartment is off Venice Boulevard between Culver City and Palms. Venice Boulevard is a busy commercial corridor that goes east to west from downtown L.A. to Venice Beach. It’s lined with ethnic restaurants featuring Korean, Brazilian, Cuban, Thai and Mexican specialties, as well as American classics such as McDonald’s, Starbucks and Baskin-Robbins — not to mention uniquely Californian options like Howard’s Avocado and Bacon Cheeseburgers. Kenley and I are looking forward to trying some of the establishments, while I’m not sure we’d be so welcome in others.

On Sunday, Kenley returned to work, and I tackled the important task of organizing our closets. I felt like I’d accomplished something after I managed to fit almost all of my clothes (and some of Kenley’s) into our walk-in closet — with just the heavier winter clothes and the linen that I still won’t wear until after Easter in our guest-bedroom closet.

Kenley wasn’t that impressed.

 I know the feeling. Since our arrival, I had been eager to visit Trader Joe’s, as Ralphs for me had been decidedly underwhelming (a grocery store should not be named after a term for vomiting).

But it’s not a good idea to go to Trader Joe’s for your first time on a Sunday afternoon. They are not large stores, and everyone, from retired liberal hippies to wannabe movie stars, was weaving their way down the aisles trying to grab the last frozen gourmet meal and organic produce, as if there wasn’t another Trader Joe’s less than two miles away.

I managed to grab asparagus risotto, sweet potato gnocchi and a baby arugula blend, which Kenley actually likes (tolerates) when drenched with raspberry gorgonzola vinaigrette.

On a later trip, I splurged and bought the $4.99 bottle of wine instead of the famed Two Buck Chuck.

I still desperately miss Publix. The Ralphs is old and small, and you can’t find everything you need at Trader Joe’s. I haven’t yet made the pilgrimage to the Whole Foods in Santa Monica, but plan to do that soon.

Kenley was off Wednesday and Thursday, so we ventured out beyond our neighborhood. Our first destination was The Grove, a shopping center in Beverly Hills, of course. It’s known for its famous farmers market, which is attached. We spotted our first celebrities together — Mario Lopez (A.C. Slater from “Saved by the Bell” and more recently host of “Extra,”) and William Shatner, who stars in “$#I! My Dad Says,” but is best known for his role as Capt. James T. Kirk in “Star Trek.” (Kenley just made me admit that I had to look that up).

But it was Malia who got the most attention at the Grove. While taking your dog with you wherever you go seems to be an accepted practice here, everyone is used to seeing people carry tiny, yippy dogs in their pocketbooks. They are not used to seeing large snow dogs in Los Angeles. She will certainly be discovered before I become the next Rachel Zoe or Kenley becomes the next Vin Diesel (his words, not mine).

Wednesday night, Kenley and I ate at Ford’s Filling Station gastropub in downtown Culver. The owner and chef is Harrison Ford’s son. It was a little pretentious for something proclaiming to be a pub, but I’ll go back for lunch or happy hour when we can sit outside.

After dinner, we hit the far less pretentious and more divelike Saints & Sinners — which has a vibe similar to The Whig — and Bigfoot West, which is strangely like a ski resort. Both are within walking distance from our apartment. Uh-oh.

On Thursday, we hit the beach. We had lunch at an organic spot in Venice that doesn’t serve Diet Coke (Kenley choked down his meal anyway). It was Malia’s first trip to the beach. She wasn’t sure what to think when she sunk into the sand, so she stayed mostly on the walking path.

Friday night after Kenley got off work, we ate at Rush Street in downtown Culver. The restaurant was big and clubby (there’s a stripper pole upstairs), but I had my favorite meal so far: pumpkin ravioli. I’ll have to go back to try the pumpkin martini. Kenley wants to go back for ladies night.

We met Ronnie and his girlfriend at Joxer Daly’s, a divey Irish pub that very strangely had a very loud Hispanic band playing bad covers. They need to hire Kenley fast!

The Road Trip

I can’t believe it has been one week since Kenley and I arrived in Los Angeles! I’m sorry I haven’t sent an update sooner. I’ve been busy getting our apartment organized and finding my way around our new neighborhood. I’m going to post two updates — one report from the road trip and one about our first week in L.A.

I’ll see how long I can keep up with weekly updates. I should eventually start a blog, but right now we don’t have Internet access at the apartment, and I’m sitting on one of the boxes on our patio so I can pirate a very weak signal. There are way too many people crowded into the local Starbucks reading scripts, talking about their acting aspirations and otherwise trying to look important. I suspect most are looking for jobs, and I’ll be forced to join their ranks next week — but more about that later.

First, here are the things I learned during our three-time zone, nine-state, 2,044-mile trek:

• You can fit a lot more than you think inside a Toyota Solara, but still not as much as you want.

• The food that is reportedly world-famous at certain diners and dives is usually just OK, but the experience is often worth it anyway.

• If the interstate system didn’t kill most of the businesses and towns along Route 66, the recession certainly will.

• Everyone who stops at the Cadillac Ranch art installation outside of Amarillo, Texas, has an interesting story to tell.

• Winslow, Ariz., is not such a fine sight to see, especially for a dog who prefers to pee on green grass and not on dusty desert roads.
• It’s disheartening to see the same strip shopping center with some combination of Bed Bath & Beyond, PetSmart and Old Navy along the interstate in every city across the country, yet when you live there, it’s one of the first places you seek out.
• New Mexico must be the most beautiful state in the country that doesn’t have a beach.

• Dogs and cats are much more adaptable than humans to almost any situation.

• I, on the other hand, start getting grumpy soon after the sun goes down, I get hungry, and I know we’ve got four more hours until our destination.
• Good music makes any drive more enjoyable.
• The Internet and the iPad are truly two of the most life-changing inventions since the car and the telephone.
• Kenley’s the driver, I’m the navigator.

Below is a slideshow of all the photos Kenley and I took on our trip.

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